Enough swearing, Fudge darn it

I don’t know how old I was when I learned my first curse word. I do, however, have a fairly clear recollection of the first time I tasted a bar of soap that followed said word. 

Recently, toddler Lily on ABC’s Modern Family uttered her first swear: “Fudge.” 

Actually, the word was bleeped and her mouth visually digitized so we have no idea what was said. 
The actors and crew on the set swear – no pun intended – that the pint-sized actress said “fudge.” 

Which makes me wonder why everyone got so worked up about it. 

Inside the Actors Studio always finishes the interview with a series of 10 questions by French television personality, Gerard Pivot. 
The most popular and anticipated is always number seven:  What’s your favourite curse word?

What are we? Twelve? We can’t wait to hear the bad word that some actor likes to use? In case you’re wondering, the most popular is not “fudge.” 

But for the Parents Television Council and several anti-cussing groups, it wasn’t just the word that shocked. 

It was its inclusion in the episode and its use by a toddler.

They claimed it was irresponsible to show this on television where other children could learn it too. 

Apparently, children of the world have never heard “fudge” around them.  Thank goodness we left them in that bubble.
However, according to a New York University professor of communicative sciences, swearing is firmly embedded in the brain at an early age. (So someone out there is already fudging up our kids anyway.) 

Because of the emotional component of the words, stroke victims who have trouble remembering everyday words can still cuss like a sailor. 

Ironically, there is a positive side to swearing.  According to a psychologist in the study of psycholinguistics at Massachusetts College, swearing increases aggression. 

This allows the body to increase its pain tolerance in extreme conditions.  

It also allows humans to be verbally aggressive without deteriorating to physical aggression.  So maybe the odd “fudge” isn’t a bad thing under the right circumstance.

Besides, experts say that nobody learns to swear from television. 

“We learn … from our siblings, from our parents, from the backyard.”  These are the people with an emotional connection to us at that early age – which is why Lily kept “fudging” when she saw how it made one of her dads laugh.

Of course, this is all fudgin’ moot.  Kids at home watching Modern Family heard a sensor bleep. Then their own parents laughing.  Another bleep.  More laughter. 

So apparently, the next generation of children will grow up to make bleeping noises and crying at every ow-ie. 

Or you can learn to live with a little fudge in your life. Of course, there are alternatives. Personally, I like piddle-futz.